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Sunday, December 9, 2007

Date nightmare

I have ventured back into the world of dating. Pure loneliness has led me here..... Blind dates are hard. I hate meeting people in bars. I have, instead jumped into the online dating scene. Again.

My first foray into the online scene was with E harmony. I started chatting with a gentleman my age who lived not far from me. On the phone, he seemed nervous but so was I. After talking on the phone a couple of times, we agreed to meet at the mall for dinner. I had a nagging feeling prior to dinner but chalked it up to nerves. Nightmare #1: he chain smoked through dinner, he was 5'5" (he had told me just shy of 6"), he was missing his front top teeth, and within 5 minutes of sitting at the table- I learned he was bipolar- his brother had been bipolar and committed suicide in jail- his sister was bipolar and had committed suicide- his niece was bipolar-and his father had been bipolar. But he wanted to have at least 7 children. NOT WITH THIS UTERUS!

I waited some time and then tried Match.com. Almost immediately I was emailed by a seemingly nice gentleman from my town. He sent me a picture and he was attractive in a burly way. We tried several times to get together but had problems coordinating our schedules. We finally met for a drink and seemed to have a good time. We continued to talk on the phone and had made a date for several nights later. Prior to the date, he called me and told me he needed to share something with me. He then said "I am bisexual, is that a problem?" UH, YEAH!

In a moment of desperation, I tried match.com, again. We met for a drink on thursday. He was a good 2 inches shorter than I was- he said he was 5'10", in actuality- closer to 5'3". Height is not everything, I said, give it a chance. He did not take his jacket off the entire time we were together. He told me he did not like curly hair ( I have naturally curly hair). He does not like bold or assertive women (check, check). Big families are all crazy (did I mention that I am one of six children). Final straw, he did not bring money with him and seemed to expect me to pay for him. He seemed put out that I expected him to pay for himself. For someone who does not like bold or assertive woman, he sure seemed to expect me to pay for the drinks when he said he did not have cash. He insisted on walking me to the car and then asked if I would consider getting my tongue pierced because he had once kissed someone with a tongue piercing and thought it was "hot". I believe my answer was F@#* NO! I don't plan to pursue this potential relationship.........

Anyone know a nice mid thirty something male in the Philadelphia are looking for a well rounded, rubenesque, independant, assertive, funny female to love?

7 comments:

FENICLE said...

I am laughing so hard right now!!! I had some pretty awful blind dates...but this date was the worst!!!

the dragonfly said...

Nightmare indeed!

Mary Beth said...

Have you not watched Criminal Minds????? At least you had someone checking on you the whole time. I wonder if he was going to get his tongue pierced too - I would say suggest it to him but I'd be too afraid he'd think it a good idea.

Rose Daughter said...

I'm soo sorry, dating was never fun, but wow, you really got matched with some winners. Still laughing, sorry. :)

painted maypole said...

oh. all I can say is I am so glad I'm not dating. And I'm sorry for you. ack. what horrors!

I do know people who have some luck with the online dating thing, though, so it can't be all bad.

KBL 2 ORD 2 SAN said...

I know some friend who've had luck with online dating. Others, not so much. Your dates sound hilarious, but only in retrospect. I'm sure they were nothing short of excruciating while you were there. Sorry!

Hey, if ever you're out in San Diego, post or email me. I have a couple of great friends...one is in his late 30s and the other is 44 and an Irish Catholic. Great guys, both of them. I wish I had a glamorous reason for whey they never married, but it was only due to their jobs. Pretty noble jobs that required long hours, but left no room for relationships to flourish. Now, a different story.

If only you were out here! :-) Good luck. Keep looking. He's out there. Trust me!

Jen M. said...

Okay, nevermind the card idea - you need to write about your bad dates.

Those are some terrible stories. What the hell is wrong with men??? Why do so many of them state that they don't want characterisitics in a woman that make us interesting? And do they think you are BLIND with the lying about the height thing? Seriously, height doesn't matter but I'm pretty sure lying does.

If I EVER come up with a candidate for you in your area I will email you posthaste.